When we have disagreements or are negotiating with each other, most of us can’t wait for the other party to stop talking so that we state our position or argument. Sometimes we interrupt the other party to get our position or argument heard. In the worst case scenario, we expressly discount the other side and insist that he/she listen to us. I truly cannot remember one instance where this technique has worked. Instead, try actively listening to the other party by listening carefully effectively. This can be done by repeating back what you understand from them (what they said, what they want, what they claim, etc…). Then, inquire about their motivations and assumptions behind their claims. Finally, acknowledge their positions.
By following this process, you will be able to collect valuable information from them, test your beliefs and assumptions (which may or may not be accurate), eliminate misunderstandings, and foster mutual understanding. Also, when they observe your behavior, strategy and technique, they will learn from you and mirror your behavior, further promoting mutual understanding. This process also forces you and them to account for any difficult tactics either of you have employed. The end result is that you are both more likely to avoid losing important information, acting on wrong assumptions, and damaging your relationship. This, of course, promotes interdependence and mutual growth. Win Win. This strategy and technique is not just helpful in high business conflicts. I can also be used by family members , co-workers, and business partners. Try it and let me know how it works for you and remember, like any other muscle, active listening is a muscle for the mind, the more you practice it, the better you get at it.
You can contact Attorney Tee Persad at 407-647-7887 or email him at firstname.lastname@example.org when you are ready to take the next step.